The GET Rap
The GET: a fight worth fighting
I m a g i n e
You are an Orthodox Jewish woman of faith, living in New York or Miami or California or Toronto or Jerusalem or Morocco. Your husband is not the man you thought he was. He might be an adulterer, psychologically threatening, physically abusive, or some combination of the three. You are desperate to get out of your marriage, but your spiteful husband won't grant you a GET, the Orthodox bill of divorce.
And according to the law, or Halachah, as the husband he has every right to do so. As the woman and wife you are a slave to his recalcitrance and to the decision of the Rabbinical court of law,
or Beit Din.
You are, effectively, in Jewish Orthodox marital prison.
Beit Dins
The Rabbinic Court is composed of three 'halakhically qualified' men
known as dayyanim. It is neither licensed nor regulated by the state (although some are under auspices of larger organizations.) Most of the procedures used in the beit din are dictated by halakhah.
Beit Dins are governed by local customs and norms that vary widely, and they are not subject to any standard record-keeping procedure.
Thus, there are countless horror stories of women being treated abruptly, coldly, and with indignity during their Beit Din visits. Crucial records have 'suddenly' disappeared. Evidence that has
been presented of perpetual marital abuse has been dismissed,
citing ancient halakhah.
And although there are dedicated rabbis and scholars trying to find loopholes around the law, and legal experts fighting for women to convene at Beit Dins, the situation remains intolerable.
Extortion
In many cases the husband tries to extort money, possessions, and custody of the children in exchange for granting the GET. Some woman have lost everything they had. Some have paid hundreds of thousands of dollars. Ironically, the Beit Dins often support the husbands in these cases.
The Ultimate Indignity
Whilst your husband is denying you your freedom, he is free to marry again. He can have more children. He can attend the same synagogue as you with his new family. He can receive an 'aliyah', the honor of being called up to the Torah. You are not allowed the same rights. If you have more children with another man while awaiting your GET, the children are considered 'mamzerim' - bastards - and are ostracized by the community.
Many women have pleaded with their Rabbis not to give these men aliyot - as there is nothing honorable about their actions - but also to intervene on their behalf and convince the husband to grant the GET, all to no avail.
Look to the future: The Pre-nuptial agreement
To ensure Orthodox women are granted a GET as a matter of course, they are now being advised before they marry to draft an air-tight halakhic prenuptial agreement. With this document, Orthodox woman can be confident that should they - or their husbands -want a divorce, there will be fair and lawful proceedings, and the GET will be granted quickly and without rancor.
GET Involved!
- Discover the organizations dedicated to fighting the GET laws.
- Help the people supporting the agunot.
